i have a question about writing an essay . how many words will go into "a page and a half" long essay?
31.July, 2009
my teacher is driving me insane with this
im in a GEd prep classes and now we are practicing the essay that is on the GED test there is only like a page and a half for it so if you go overboard with it you immediately fail the essay which i think is completely bogus i talked with him ( the teacher) yesterday about my writing he said that i do everything great i keep it organized , there is the structure of the essay etc.. but my biggest downfall or weakness is that i just cannot write a short essay like i write all those papers and i need space in order to get my idea across i do not wanna squeeze something into a page and a half that im not gonna be happy with
he told me to practice over the weekend and give some work for him to check on on Tues.
i think that it pretty much depends on the topic of the essay like there are some topics that you can really write a lot about and some shitty ones that you just do not know what the heck you wanna write and how to start
like yesterday i gave him a 2 and a half page essay it had like almost 900 words it did took me a bit longer to write it as i needed to do the research to be accurate with the info that i gave there but in classroom i can easily write a page and a half within like 30 minutes
so assuming that im doing a page and a half essay lets say about friendship with this topic" what is better to have a small group of friends or a large network of acquaintances" this is something that i did before but i only wrote 1 paragraph and it was page long but assuming im doing an essay on this will each paragraph have to be like 5 sentences long ???? thats not a lot to talk about i mean its really limited
If he wants a page and a half, give him a page and a half.. Don’t buck the system… The answer is to do a little outline first.
I note that your question is full of minor errors. I’m not going to pick it apart… but you need to. Forget cool web shorthand and start writing clear and precise English. Capitalise where it needs it and keep things consistent. Look at your intro.
my teacher is driving me insane with this
im in a GEd prep classes
No cap on my.
No period after this.
No cap on im.
No ‘ in I’m.
No period after classes.
You’re in A classes?
GED
This is just carelessness.
That alone could flunk you…
Try ‘The Elements of Style’. It’s the best grammar/style aid ever written.. And it’s short, clear and available free on the web.
Good luck….
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29.July, 2009
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29.July, 2009
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I sat watching the pigeons strut around my feet, their heads bobbing, pecking at the ground for invisible crumbs, stopping every so often to assess their place in life and then continuing with their arduous task. I began to wonder into the abyss of my thoughts, anywhere would be better than this dreary tube station. As I begin to sink deeper in I began to think how I’m not that different from those pigeons, grasping at the crumbs on the floor that fall from the top table, desperately trying to get their hands on the whole loaf of bread yet never quite reaching their goal. Although I’m at least a level higher than the pigeons, because to them I’m at the top table, I’m in control, me, Ian Shultz.
My trail of thought was interrupted by the horrid sound of grinding teeth belonging to the man to the left of me, this man being Charlie Dougs. A freak of the highest standard and yet for some reason a good friend of mine, something that I had never fully understood. Grinding his teeth was a trait of Charlie’s, a usual side effect of his addiction to speed, along with his usual shaking, normally most apparent in his hands. His twitching was not an effect of him taking the drug immediately but was a long term effect due to his long term use of the drug leaving him with paranoia and a severe case of anxiety. His non stop shakes left him less of a man and more of a constant blur of movement.
To my left was the complete opposite, hardly any movement at all, if it wasn’t for sight you wouldn’t even know Babié was there. Babié being short for Babiénco Del Fuegos, he was Puerto Rican and didn’t speak much, maybe because he didn’t understand much. It always took him a while to put two and two together and when he tried doing so it normally made seven. He was tall, with jet black hair, darkish complexion and I swear I never saw the man without a lighted cigarette in his hand. If a bullet didn’t get him first then I was sure lung cancer would, though to most a bullet is far from anywhere in there daily lives, for us three a bullet was as common as muck. Though not many people’s job tools include a gun, and their job description doesn’t normally involve killing for a certain price. Hitmen being the correct term to be affiliated with our sorts, though you’d think with such a well paying job we would have better scenery than a dingy tube station, complete with homeless men and the occasional smell of piss.
I glanced at the clock, 5:02 am, the train was late by 2 minutes, nothing major yet Charlie’s shaking and teeth grinding increased due to the fear of some terrible thing preventing the train from arriving on time. For the first time I noticed the carton of milk he had in his hand that he was swigging mechanically, trying to comfort himself with it somehow. As his imagination began to run wild and he began to loose what little control he had left, the train pulled into the station. I caught a reflection of myself as it screeched to a halt, me sitting in my creaseless black suit complete with white shirt and black tie, fitting attire for a man in my line of business, made me look rather stylish. My hair brownish verging on black slicked back though the stubble on my face let the side down a bit, withdrawing the effect of a sharply dressed man. Though compared to Charlie’s lightly bearded face, scruffy blonde shoots of hair I looked like the best dressed man alive.
As the people clambered off the train we rose stepping from the platform onto the tightly cramped coffin. Charlie going first, squeezing into a spot only a man of his weight could have squeezed into, him being the weight of a ragdoll on a diet, meanwhile me and Babié found it harder to manoeuvre in such a tight space, us being of average height and build.
When we eventually got through the group of people who seemed no longer separate entities but rather tightly packed together and could not be any closer, yet mentally couldn’t have been anymore distant from each other. I found Charlie sitting on a seat he had somehow found and leapt onto, though was finding it hard to stay on. The people next to him gave up their seats and moved as far away as possible from him, which was the recurring effect Charlie had on people.
This is really good, something I’d really want to read. I enjoy stories about rough and tumble people on drugs and I’m curious to know more about these characters. Anyway, this is pretty wordy without a lot of action, so my first thought is to edit down as much as you can. Also, try not to start with the word ‘I’ at the beginning. Something like, ‘The pigeons strutted around my feet,’ just sounds tighter IMO and I think 2 sentences would prevent that from running on so much.
By editing down, here’s an example of what I would do with one of your sentences:
‘As I sank deeper into my thoughts, I realized I’m not that different from those pigeons, desperately trying to get the whole loaf yet never quite reaching their goal.’
Pigeons don’t have hands 
It gets the point across without so many words. Just a few suggestions, but I really like these characters and it’s a terrific start.
Good luck!
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27.July, 2009
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27.July, 2009
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27.July, 2009
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24.July, 2009
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24.July, 2009
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